For some reason, I have always had a hard time discussing gay people. I have been taught that to be gay is wrong and we do not tolerate it. I have always had a problem with this. As proposition 8 has passed, (I’m supposed to be thrilled) this issue has been on a lot of people’s minds, and our church has been at the forefront of several discussions. I have been reading this month’s Ensign, and found a talk to be especially interesting. I really like a most of them, but this one fits this subject. It is the talk by Elder Robert D. Hales titled, “Christian Courage: The Price of Discipleship”. I have had many talks with friends and family about why it’s wrong to be gay, and every explanation given to me doesn’t make sense to me. I don’t even have any close relationships with gay people, I know several, but I have never discussed any of this with them. I just feel so bad for them. I try to put myself in their shoes, and can’t imagine anyone telling me who I can or cannot love. I have said this to my closest friends and family before, but, for those of you who are not gay, try to imagine if someone tried to tell you that it was wrong for you to love your spouse, or date who you’re dating, or, in my case, love a man. What would you do? Can you imagine how hard that would be? Your body and mind are attracted to one thing, but supposedly, you are supposed to love another. I just don’t feel it’s anyones’ place to tell us who we should love. I know I am going against everything the church teaches. That this is their particular trial, and as hard as it may be, they are to endure this and if they are strong enough they will find a way to marry in the temple, have children, and live a happy “normal” life. Those gay people that I do know have to deal with this every day. It is not something that you get over. That you get used to and move on. It is a daily struggle for their entire lives. Trust me when I say that I am so grateful that this is not my trial. To those of you who don’t feel the way I do, may I just say that I am not trying to start an argument, or say that we, as a church, should change our position on this. I am just trying to get those of you who are quick to judge, and call them bad, or wrong, or dirty, or gross, or whatever you may think of them to not judge. To love them, and be grateful that you are not struggling with what they are. In this talk it states that “Some people mistakenly think responses such as silence, meekness, forgiveness, and bearing humble testimony are passive or weak. But to “love our enemies, bless them that curse us, do good to them which despitefully use us, and persecute us” takes faith, strength, and most of all, Christian courage.” It says “As true disciples, our primary concern must be others’ welfare, not personal vindication.”
“True disciples avoid being unduly judgmental of others’ views.” President Monson has taught, “Let us learn respect for others…None of us lives alone—in our city, our nation, or our world.” “We are always better staying on the higher ground of mutual respect and love.” “Whatever someone’s race, creed, religion, political persuasion, (and I will add sexuality) if we follow Christ and show forth His courage, we must love them. We do not feel we are better than they are.”
I know that this is quite a post, and I do not usually post about anything but my kids, but this is something that has been on my mind a lot lately, and I just wanted to share my thoughts on it. I get really bugged when people jump at the chance to bag on other people. And the next time this issue comes up in your conversation, take a moment to put yourself in their shoes and think carefully about what you are saying.
Let me know what you think. Good or bad. And who knows, we didn’t used to let black men hold the priesthood because “the world wasn’t ready for it” so maybe one day, when the world is ready, this won’t be an issue anymore either.